Alas, March comes to a close.
Maybe it’s not alas. To be honest, March has not been the greatest month of my life. Or anyone’s, for that matter.
Normally if I was to write a month recap it would include stuff from every aspect of my life, except those have all been put on an indefinite hold until the coronavirus is all over. So instead of categorizing my month into different parts, it’s going to kind of be a random jumble of what went on.
*disclaimer* this post is probably going to contain some mini – or not so mini – rants about COVID-19, so if you don’t want to see that, please move on to another post. (Not political rants, just personal opinion rants.) This post might also be a little long – I’m kind of writing it to help me process and look back on in the future.
Enjoy . . .
This is where it gets sad. I really can’t remember if I mentioned this on SS&SS yet, but we’ve been self-quarantining since March 1st because my grandma lives with us and she’s elderly, and my dad and brother both have bad asthma. So for our personal safety, my parents decided to pull us out of school the first week of March and not hang out with friends or go to church. I kept the real reason I wasn’t at school a secret from my friends that first week to avoid being called “crazy.” And then spring break happened the second week of March and I started to tell more of my friends because they started wondering why I couldn’t hang out with them over the break. Towards the end of break, the school district announced we wouldn’t be returning to school for another week – and the next day, they pushed that out until March 30th. Now, schools are closed until May 1 (which is about two weeks before summer break starts). In conclusion, I didn’t have to keep it a secret after that.
And now the biggest problem as far as my friends are concerned is seriously how much I miss them. I’ve gotten super close to a group of friends at school who ski with me, as well as some girls at my youth group and then some friends from AHG. I miss them all a ton – not a day goes by that I don’t wish I was with them at that very moment.
Quarantine has been . . . an interesting experience. I can’t say it’s been good, but it hasn’t been totally awful, either. The biggest issue for me is I can’t leave my house to ski (I’m a competitive cross-country skier, which y’all know already), and that makes me super depressed. My family has spent a lot of time watching movies, but I’ve also been hiding in my room, so that’s not super great. But now that it’s the end of the month, our city has basically shut down and people are expected to stay at home unless they go outside for recreation, and then they have to stay six feet apart from other people. So I’m not alone anymore – all of my friends are going through the same thing I am.
– Swimming / Skiing
At the end of last year’s ski season, I got very depressed because I wasn’t training with a club team after the school season was over, and because of that I didn’t motivate myself enough to go ski on a daily basis. I was really hoping to avoid that this year, and now I can’t. I was planning on starting club swimming at the beginning of March for a couple of months until the club skiing season started and then do both of those simultaneously all summer. And now I’m not doing either, so instead I’m doing online workouts by myself – and a few times a week, I FaceTime my friend M (who doesn’t live in Alaska) and we workout together. That’s been super fun.
– Master of FaceTime
So yeah, that’s kind of what I’ve become this month. I would love to figure out how much time I’ve spent on video chat with people this month, because I know the number would be pretty high. I’ve probably spent a good few days of my life on FaceTime with my friends since the beginning of the month.
– Rant rant rant
I’m sorry, but I have to just momentarily. The beginning of March was really hard for me – I was a little scared to share my family’s situation with my friends. My few friends who I did tell early on all had very different reactions (some good, some not so good). The people in my life who thought/still think people are overreacting to the coronavirus didn’t get why I was at quarantined at home, and that left me feeling a little helpless . . . it was my parents’ decision, not mine. Another thing is people being selfish, and I don’t mean hoarding toilet paper (although maybe I do mean that too). People being clueless about the situation the world is in and going out in public and potentially spreading COVID-19 may not put THEM at risk – but it puts OTHERS at risk. People like my grandmother, my dad, and my brother. It makes me angry, but there’s also literally nothing I can do about it. I don’t want to overshare here on the Internet because my blog is public, so I’ll stop now.
– The good things
Like I said, quarantine isn’t all bad. I’ve started checking up with friends who live out of state or who I don’t talk to that much to ask how they and their families are doing, and that’s a really good thing. My dad has gotten funnier since he started working from home, and we see him a lot more than we did previously (he spends a lot of time working away from home in a different city in Alaska). I’ve found more time to play with my dogs, as well as blog (as you guys know!) and read purely for fun. I downloaded Spotify premium to listen to the music I want when I want, and I get up early and go ice skating at the rink up the street from us before people start waking up and walking their dogs. My room has stayed very clean, and I broke my nail-biting-when-I’m-stressed habit. I’ve built stronger relationships with friends because we’re far apart and have to make ourselves think about purposely reaching out to talk. We have to think positively. And seeing all of the companies in the world come together to help our global community has been very inspiring. (Audible in streaming free audiobooks while school is out, guys!) If you need a smile, follow @upworthy on Instagram to see some seriously awe-inspiring videos and pictures.
I don’t talk about God much on my blog, or at least I haven’t in the past. If you don’t already know, I’m a Christian. I haven’t gone to church in about 6-7 ish weeks (to social distance before our quarantine), and going from church three times a week – for services, youth group, and volunteering with the middle school youth group – to not going at all has been extremely difficult for me. Our church is fairly large and I had a hard time connecting with the youth group and other students over the past couple of years, and I really began to feel like I fit in this year and make friends. So to have that taken away from me was one of the worst parts of this. BUT God has really shown Himself to me these last four weeks and I am proud to say I have read my Bible EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. I am the kind of person who sucks at regularly reading their Bible, but I’ve spent hours reading it and doing Bible study plans online every night, and it has made a HUGE difference in how I’m dealing with our world’s current situation. I’m read the books of Romans and Hebrews and they were both very inspiring and mind-changing (especially Romans – read it, guys!) And fortunately, my youth group has moved to live, online hour-long broadcasts every week, and that has been fantastic. My church is also streaming services online every Sunday, so my family does church at home. (If you’re feeling stressed, go download the YouVersion Bible app and read the plans Anxious for Nothing or Not Afraid: How Christians Can Respond to Crises. The verses from those plans (especially Anxious for Nothing) are so relevant right now.
I’ll end here with this. One thing has stuck with me over the last couple weeks – Philippians 4: 6-7, NLT. “Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.” The verse was talked about on one of our youth group broadcasts, and I’ve seen it repeatedly in my current Bible study plan and on social media. It’s really inspired me, and I hope it inspires you, too.
Anyway, this post has kind of turned into a diary entry and I didn’t really mean for it to, so please accept my sincerest apologies. Kudos to you if you stuck with me all the way through. I love you guys.
Stay safe and at home. Wash your hands. And, most importantly, be kind. Everyone is going through the same things you are.